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Fine. I'll try something Elsa. (How was that? Did it make you Olaf?)

Admit it. Best pun you've read so far.

I will have you know that I have an intellect rivaled only by garden tools!!!

I was only telling you for your safety. Watch out for the Walnut. He's crazy. Dare I say... A real nut. *Ba-Dum-Tss*

Nuuuu, it is 100% real. True statistic right there.

Psssshhh. I ain't dumb. My momma says I'm special!

Positive. In fact, I have a peanut-mobile. Check it out on google images! Note that the camouflage really makes it equally intimidating and difficult to detect in public.

You have pretty harsh statistics. D;

Forcing the remaining digletts back into the dark, they bitterly accepted defeat preparing for revenge. In these current days, there are digletts good and bad, but we must never forget the Great Battle that took place many eons ago.

A plan was hatched to defeat the seemingly omnipotent diglett army that was conquering all. Those who had once quarreled between themselves all banded together to crush the enemy at hand. The tides began to turn as the allies swarmed the endless waves of digletts. At long last, they had...

Unicorns, peanuts, even walnuts were not safe. All were under an attack from deep beneath the earth. A deep hatred towards the digletts grew quickly bonding all the other creatures in a similar hatred towards their greatest enemy. As cultures fell, such as the dinosaurs, all the leaders from...

That's not at all how I remember it. What actually happened was more along the lines of this: Diglett-kind had been experiencing their greatest times. Their people prospered, and life was good. Unfortunately, this resulted in overpopulation. The digletts took drastic measures, acting selfishly...

They took my parents from me... that is why they call me Bat-Nut. I fight for those who cannot.

Untrue. Never has a subject with the disease ever not died from it. In fact, 100% of people who breathe oxygen die too! Down with 02, it is a death gas!!!

Hazelnuts are allies with the wanluts. I have no qualms about their destruction.

Droopy-eye syndrome is a threat to us all!!! My statistics say that 100% of people who contract the disease die!

I hate to admit it, but those hazelnuts are absolutely delicious.

Chocolate is a gateway drug for... I dunno, but it has to be bad for your health!!! It just tastes soooo good! Ps: that tape worked really well.

I only lie when I am in bed. I find it difficult to sleep standing or sitting. You can't trust Snappy, he is trying to turn you against peanut-kind!!!

Turn those pointy eyes upside down!!! /(^-^)\ Droopy pointy eyes are dangerous for your health. Trust me. I'm a doctor(ish).

That's exactly what you said about unicorns!!! Animal hater, I will call PETA on you!!!!!!!111!!!1!!111!!!eleven!!

Both hateful, wrinkly creatures. #Unbiased

I hold no hate for them! I ain't racist!!! I feel that we are all equal. Except for stinkin' walnuts. AND THERE IS NOTHING TOO AWESOME FOR PEANUT!!!

Nuuu, I am slain! *DEAD*

Tis but a myth. (But narwhals are better...) Snappy here eats unicorns for breakfast. An outrage if you ask me!!!

I personally think that ThatOnePeanutGuysBiggestFan has a certain ring to it, wouldn't you say? ;D I think _Snap is pretty good.

Psshh. I give up. Eat peanuts if you so choose. Just know that I don't appreciate cruelty towards my people.

What about when your phone dies?!? Think of the future, Aimee. Do it for the children.